Mind Your Heart
Welcome to "Mind Your Heart," this cozy corner of the internet where Trina Deboree and Emily Reneé —your real-life Lorelei and Rory Gilmore duo—come together each week to chat about everything from mental health to the daily nuances of life. In each episode, we peel back the layers of topics like anxiety, depression, PTSD, and eating disorders with warmth, understanding, and a touch of humor (because otherwise, this just sounds depressing)!
Trina, an educator turned entrepreneur and mental health advocate, joins forces with her daughter Emily, a mental health coach and anorexia survivor, to share their journeys and insights in a way that feels like a heart-to-heart with old friends. The goal? To spark conversations that truly matter and to create a space where laughter meets healing.
Let's navigate the ups and downs of mental health together, making each day brighter and each challenge a little lighter. Grab your emotional support water bottle, put in your headphones, and join us while we mind our hearts for chats that comfort and inspire.
Mind Your Heart
Medication Changed His Life
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Imagine overcoming the fear and misconceptions of medication to find newfound clarity and peace. In this episode of Mind Your Heart Podcast, we welcome our first guest, Jake, who shares his powerful journey dealing with anxiety and depression. Jake’s candid storytelling, paired with Emily’s heartfelt reflections, offers an intimate look into the challenges of starting medication and the transformative effects it can have on mental health.
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Hey, welcome to Mind your Heart Podcast, your favorite corner of the internet where we chat about all things mental health.
Speaker 2:I'm Emily and I'm Trina. Together, we're like your real-life Lorelai and Rory Gilmore. Each week, we'll bring you real conversations about the world of mental health and we will peel back layers on topics like anxiety, depression and much more.
Speaker 1:We're here to chat with you about the tough stuff, the everyday stuff and everything in between. So grab your emotional support water bottle I know we have ours. Find your comfiest chair or keep your eyes on the road and let's get into it. Are you ready, mom?
Speaker 2:Absolutely. Join us as we mind our hearts and hopefully make minding yours a little easier. Welcome back. Welcome back.
Speaker 1:Emily, welcome back. Trina, welcome to the Mind your Heart podcast Today. I'm so excited. Yeah, we have our first official guest. Yay, this guest is the best.
Speaker 2:In the studio as well. That's the other bright spot of this in-person guests?
Speaker 1:yes, which will the guests that we'll have? So this is the start of kind of like our guest segment for a little bit of fall. Um, so the next like four or five episodes we'll have some really awesome people come on and chat with us. But, um, today our first guest is a very special guest. He's all right, we love him.
Speaker 3:So much we do love him so much.
Speaker 1:He, yeah, is one of the very best people that I know.
Speaker 2:I mean you could probably guess he's a blessing and gift to our whole family.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so we have Jake, my boyfriend, hi, hi, jake, hi.
Speaker 3:How are you? I'm doing good.
Speaker 1:How do you feel about that intro? It's pretty good, okay, thank you. We think this is going to be an interesting interview, because Jake is normally a man of few words. That is his thing that is true.
Speaker 2:However, lately I have felt, like he's, that you've definitely been more talkative. I even said this at the beach house, which is kind of one of the reasons we even talked about doing this episode. Yeah, because I was like, wow, jake seems so happy, are things going good at work? Like Like he's like so much more talkative and like really, you were really invested in the games and I don't know, I just noticed like a brightness. I mean you always have had such, I mean a great personality and wonderful, you're wonderful. But it was like I don't know. It was as if you were like completely awake and just yeah, but it was like I don't know.
Speaker 1:It was as if you were like completely awake and just yeah, like something was different, yeah, and something was different. So that's kind of what we're talking about today. So I guess, like our first, our lead into this would be like, could you kind of explain, like how, the difference between what you were feeling before you took medication and when you now are on medication and you're not in the stage of it being like you feel like you're going to throw up?
Speaker 3:all the time, yeah, so the best way that I can like describe it is like before medication I was feeling like pretty anxious, pretty. At the time I didn't necessarily know that it was like depression, um. But being on the other side of it now I'm like, oh yeah, like I was depressed, um, and just like things that would give me like joy in life or the basic joys in life didn't um or didn't as much, because like things like doing little things around the house or like I love Starbucks, um, shout out Starbucks um, like that wouldn't even necessarily bring me as much joy as it used to um. But then once I got a medication, it was kind of like a new whole perspective, like you were kind of saying, like it felt like my mind was unlocked in a way. Um, like there was just a sense of clarity that after the negative side effects, yeah, because that was for like well, a couple weeks, I think like three or four I don't think, because it was when I was on half and then on the full.
Speaker 1:I think it was like two Well.
Speaker 2:I mean he, he probably knows how we felt, yeah.
Speaker 1:I know, but I mean, he was also like really good at communicating it. So but yeah, either way.
Speaker 3:It was a rough transitionary period but I stuck it out. You were very encouraging with that and knowing that, like you had been through what you had been through trying to find your medication it was super helpful to have that modeled yeah, yeah, I think, and I so I guess that like my question would be also like, what made you be like, yeah, now I'm gonna start medication?
Speaker 1:because before you took medication, like I had definitely encouraged you to like see a psychiatrist and see what they even said, like about taking medication, um, prior to you doing that. So, and for a little while I feel like that was something I was like, oh, maybe like you should try and see what happens. So, like, what was the thing? Or can you even pinpoint the thing that was like okay, yeah, like I'm gonna do that, yeah um, like at first I I was.
Speaker 3:I think what I was outwardly showing was like oh, it's too expensive.
Speaker 3:I can't we can't afford that. Um, like I know how much like meds can cost and like I know I know like from your experience, like oh, you had you had a psychiatrist, it was over a hundred dollars and I was like I can't do that on a regular basis. But I think what, what that really was, was kind of like a masking of fear of something new and not necessarily knowing what that would do Not for like the negative side effects, but I think like changing me personally.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah. You feel like it's going to make you a different version of yourself. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:And I've heard stories of like oh, people feel like zombies, yeah, which is when people are overmedicated.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so um, that that can happen, but then you know that that's too much of a medication. It should never like can change your personality. It should never like change your personality. It should like enhance how you feel, but not be. You're not a completely different person?
Speaker 1:Right yeah.
Speaker 3:You feel?
Speaker 1:like a better version of yourself, for sure Not a non-version of yourself.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:And that's definitely like what I feel now. But I think that was like a big thing for having a fear of doing it. Um, but I think also it kind of like me, like my, my mental state kind of got to the point where I was like I don't really know what else to do. Um, like you had even said, like you seem like depressed or like down or like unhappy. Um, and I was like, yeah, like I, I do feel that way and like what's the harm? Like I'm still under 26, so I'm still on my dad's plan.
Speaker 2:So shout out, dad yeah, shout out Tony, which is actually a really good thing that we have in America, honestly like that's a we should yeah, yeah, I mean why not? Yeah, be on, you know, be able to be on somebody's plan.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and so having that monetary cost, I was like covered. I was like well, you got no more excuses, but then also like just your encouragement of I think you could really benefit from this. And I just went online while I was at work, um, and just looked up psychiatrists in Tampa or Branson or whatever, and then I found one on telehealth and she was super cool. The way I could describe it is like she was like big sister vibes, and so it was like I felt very comfortable and she was like we'll just start you on something small, but it was really good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it was definitely like, and I think and you can tell me if you agree with this or not but I think, like almost having my like kind of shitty experiences with psychiatrists, I was also like okay, this is what you're going to look for of, if this is working or if it's not.
Speaker 1:And I remember, like you, after your first appointment, you were like yeah, like that was really good, and she like wants to start slow and like she also wants to incorporate like different, like eating habits to be better my sleep, and I'm like good, I'm like perfect, check, check, check, like then, like she knows what she's doing. Basically, because it's like you have to vet the person.
Speaker 2:You definitely do. It makes all the difference, even, like I mean for me as well. And also also I say, the number one thing is actually finding a psychiatrist and not a general practitioner I don't think general practitioners have any business prescribing these kinds of medications, and it happens all the time that's crazy, it's crazy. And actually in canada, where they have you know um health care, like really good health care, they they have to go to a general practitioner. They can't go to a psychiatrist, isn't that really yeah?
Speaker 2:I think that's upsetting Um so they're just very much about like the general practitioner, like is the one that's in control.
Speaker 1:Are they trained?
Speaker 2:differently? No, they're not. They need to go to psychiatrists. They just don't have access to psychiatrists like we do. So it is, it is really crazy when you think that you know they're so much more advanced in this area. They're not.
Speaker 1:Is there more of like a controlled substance issue in Canada? I don't think so.
Speaker 2:Um, it's just that I mean, I really feel strongly about this because I've had an OBGYN tried to prescribe these kinds of things to me. I have had a general practitioner and they just don't know what they're doing. The psychiatrist is an expert. They understand, especially ones that specialize in medication and how it impacts your brain and how it works in your brain and all those things, and that's really important.
Speaker 2:And if you find someone that you feel uncomfortable like when Jackson went to two different psychiatrists to deal with his ADHD, the first psychiatrist was like was like so adamantly opposed to certain kinds of medication and and so it was like what? Like he wasn't even and to have like such a narrow focus from the get go, you really want someone that's open minded about different things, and so I think that's great that you found I've had some good luck and some not so good luck, and when I found a psychiatrist that I had for years and years, I loved her, she was wonderful and she it made all the difference. Yeah, um, and I was able to bounce things off of her and also for for you and I like bar.
Speaker 2:The way that our bodies metabolize certain medications, like I kept running into this isn't working anymore. Not to try something else, and it was a big. You just need someone that's very patient and willing to figure it out, and I think that's so important. And then I had kind of a I don't want to say lazy, but like a. It was fine if I was just maintaining, but if I needed any adjustment he wasn't my guy. Now I again finally feel like I am with someone that will make sure that I am getting what I need.
Speaker 2:I think one thing that I was wondering if this is true for you, jake the minute it started really kicking in, which was not too long it was pretty relatively short I was. I felt like I wished I had done this sooner, because it was like you don't even realize that you're walking around with a little bit of like a dark cloud over your head until you're like holy crap, I can see Like this is. So I feel so much better. That's how I feel so much better. And even when things stop working sometimes for me and I have to make adjustments, the way that my depression comes out is anger and I'll all of a sudden be like really pissed off at things and I'm like, why am I so mad? Like the lady that cut me off in traffic is the worst thing ever. And I'm like something's going on Like I'm really mad about things I don't need to be so mad about. And again, the minute it's adjusted, I'm like whoa, this is. It feels so much better, yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah Well, funny story the first time that I ever felt any like reaction to it, or like the first night I took it. It was a full dose and I was like I looked at Emily, I was like I feel like funny it.
Speaker 3:It felt like I was like tipsy and like high and just like wonky I was, like I just feel so silly yeah like that's like, that's like the best way I could put it as like I just felt silly, um, and she was like, well, it's okay, like she was very patient and very kind and very nurturing um, and then so she's like you could just go down to half. Yeah, no, it was huge, because I was like I feel strange um, oh, he was like.
Speaker 1:I feel like my whole body is vibrating yeah like all the time and I was like okay, well, like you're it's, you're putting something foreign yeah, like here's your brain chemicals yeah, adjusted, and I'm like so, like it's, that's not like a shock. I'm like, do you feel like okay enough to like that? We can just monitor it like where are you at with that? And so then we started kind of coming up with a way to like scale, like where you were at on like the yeah danger level yeah yeah, I never felt like I was really like in danger.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it was just because, like I knew we're in a safe space, like with you and all of that um.
Speaker 3:But the first clarity, the best way I can describe like the biggest change from pre-medication to post-medication is just clarity yeah um, I think the first time you could correct me if I'm wrong, because I feel like I told you um is we were in a staff meeting and I had been called on for something. It wasn't like an aggressive or. I got you called on, brian. The lead pastor was kind of like Jake, how do you feel about this? Or whatever, and I like responded and I didn't feel any anxiety. Yes, in the past it was kind of like I would get called on and like my hand would start to shake.
Speaker 3:Like my voice would tremble and things of that nature. But then I like didn't get the shakes at all and then more and more stuff, things like that happened. Then I was like it was just that clarity and that peace of those interactions was just really nice.
Speaker 2:Did you feel like when you were like younger, where that didn't bother you so much and you were easy going when you got called on? Or have you always had a little bit of a feeling of anxiety about it?
Speaker 3:I wouldn't say that like my sorry. I would say that my anxiety started kind of when I began like my adult life. Okay, when I was younger I would I don't necessarily remember being anxious in school Okay, like I wouldn't get nervous or called on or whatever um, but I think I was also like comfortable in that space because I was very like smart and like school came very easy to me. So I felt very comfortable, um, but I'd say it was really more just in my adult life.
Speaker 2:I was just wondering that because I wonder how much like hormones and things play an impact on that. The reason I say that? Because that story just wonder how much like hormones and things play an impact on that. The reason I say that because that story just reminded me of, like when I was younger, like when I was in high school and things like that. I felt the same way, like confident. I don't remember feeling anxious. I know there were certain things that I look back on and I'm like that was definitely anxiety that I don't like, didn't know about at the time but whoops, but I um should I make sure?
Speaker 2:it's still recording um just pull the cord, oh yeah, okay, cool, leave it on the ground for now. Um, okay. So I remember feeling like really confident and very like I had a lot of friends and like I was in a bunch of clubs and those you know, vice president, all these, whatever and so I felt I was in student council. I I totally felt comfortable talking about how I felt about things. I've always been very opinionated, so I like share things, like I feel like this and and I always felt completely fine.
Speaker 2:But as I got older, like in my later 20s, I started like getting more like insecure, like not feeling as confident about and wanting to say things, but but like feeling this, like I would be in a group of people and this was like teaching and I actually felt like I knew a lot about teaching and I would feel like, oh gosh, and I didn't know that was anxiety, like I had no idea that was anxiety. But then when I started taking the medication, I was like I felt like myself again. I was like, oh, I have something to say about that and it would pipe up and not feel like scared or whatever. So I just remember feeling like this was me, like this was the real me.
Speaker 2:Like this is, this is how I was, and then I somehow wasn't Does that make sense.
Speaker 3:Yeah, at Centerpoint where I work they. There's been different scenarios that have come up um where I've kind of had to be in a more speaking position or things like that, um, and they've dubbed it Lexapro Jake, um, and just because it's like kind of like me out of like my outer shell, or cause I was very quiet, reserved, um, things of that. I keep saying things of that nature.
Speaker 1:Um, I have not even noticed that you've said yeah, me either all right so you're only paying attention to it all right, sounds good.
Speaker 3:Um, but they they dubbed it alexa pro jake, which is very. I think it's so funny.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, well, I'm glad that you think that's funny, because some people might, you know, be like well, but there there definitely is a difference to you and it does feel like a more confident I'm not afraid to say what I think kind of a and also just happier. Yeah, you just seem happier, yeah.
Speaker 3:I feel like was it my mom who also said that, or maybe it was Nicole. Nicole is the you talked about Nicole, um, but she was saying like you just seem like brighter, yeah, and we did like a staff Olympics where I kind of had to lead and speak and all of that.
Speaker 1:Well, you like put the whole thing, you and Grace put the whole thing together. Yeah, so sorry, keep going.
Speaker 3:No, you're good, but I had to speak in front of like basically all of our staff for two hours and like there was like like anxiety there, but it wasn't like a crippling anxiety that. I had it was kind of like a.
Speaker 1:There's just that self-awareness of I'm anxious, but I'm not gonna let it control me and that's definitely something that the medication has helped me have that clarity again yeah, and even like after they did the staff Olympics, like multiple people came to me and they were like Jake did so good, like he was like just talking to all of us. We all had such a good time, like he was really able to like lead it and like just make us all laugh, like he's so funny and I'm like, yeah, I know he is funny, yeah.
Speaker 2:And that comes out more as well, like your personality comes out more, which is nice. I think that's. I think that's so. I think that's really great, jake, and also like figuring it out so young, I mean. I feel like this went on for a long time for me before I figured out that I needed any kind of. But you know, some people may be thinking like you know, why go to medication as the first, like first line of defense, but you're you're doing more than medication, like you're also talking talking to someone too.
Speaker 3:Right. Well, so the the psychiatrist that I see there is a little bit like of therapy in there, um, but the way that she describes it is like a I believe it's a table or a chair, whereas like medication is like one leg. But, then there's other things that make it up to. So you have that stability.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and at first I was like I just need to get need to get the medication now, because that's when I was having the negative side effects, yeah. But now it's like, ok, you need to work on drinking more water, eating more, eating three meals, getting good rest and going to bed on time, things like that. But it's been really, really life-changing just having that and I think, the reason why I was able to do it. So it's going to sound self-gratifying, but faithfully, because I know people try and then they're like, no, I don't want to do it anymore.
Speaker 3:The side effects are too much. It's because, like you modeled it, um, just cause, like you went through so many and so many and like you just kept going through and like trying something else, like we're going to figure it out, we're going to figure it out. And then also, like when I was having the negative side effects, it wasn't like and I wasn't like you should eat something.
Speaker 1:Like not like you need to have three meals, like she said. Um, it was kind of just like I'm gonna meet you where you are and then we'll figure it out together. Oh, that's nice yeah, I mean, like I know how like rough it was when, like I was trying to figure it out and I also like I feel like I can now. When you were starting stuff, I was like I can see this from, yeah, like a 50 foot view instead yeah, and so like when you were like I'm not hungry, like I'm not gonna eat.
Speaker 1:I'm like I remember feeling so nauseous that, like you, don't want to eat anything. But I'm like I also remember when I had at least something like plain and small, it makes you feel better. Yeah and so I'm like I like understand what you're feeling, but I'm like I'm telling you like just eat like one piece of bread yeah, like just something so that way, like you don't keep feeling like this, um.
Speaker 2:So yeah, I'm yeah, and some of those symptoms are those side effects I should say symptoms the side effects get better Because, like, I have a medication that makes me kind of I take it at night because of the. It also makes me tired. So I'm like, and it normally typically is given in the daytime but I'm like, well, I can't because it's making me so tired. So it actually helps me go to sleep and it makes me a little bit nauseous if I haven't eaten like hours before that. But when I do, then it's fine. I don't feel that way. But I think you know some things you have to decide. Is this better, like, obviously, if you're not eating and you're, you know that's not healthy.
Speaker 2:you need to eat and then for me, like one of the medications, like it affects your metabolism and makes it go down to nothing, and when you're past menopause, like that can be an issue for you. I'm like, well, great, now I've gained weight and so, and you don't. It's like what do you want to focus on? Like now, that makes me depressed.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So, there's things like anything because, it was like you just felt like kind of sick, like everything that you ate like just didn't taste good because you felt nauseous. But I was like okay, so like why don't we just say that like you're gonna try this for one more week and if you still feel completely miserable and at the same level, yeah then like you can call your psychiatrist and you'll try something else.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I'm like, but if you feel better in a couple of days, then like let's give it a couple more days and just see, like giving yourself the chance to see if it'll change, and also like being like, okay, if it doesn't, I'm allowed to like do something, stop yeah, like I don't have to keep feeling like this either like it doesn't have to be hit tails or a horn like it can be I get to pick one good option and not have the rest.
Speaker 3:So, yeah, it definitely tapered, thankfully. Yeah, that's good. And then it respawned back up when I went back to the full dose, but that didn't last as long as the first initial point. Yeah, and so I was like thank gosh.
Speaker 1:And you kind of have the tools to do that too. At that point you were like okay, I know what to expect and I know like how I can. Yeah, pb and j, that was like all you ate for like a couple of weeks.
Speaker 2:Man, I need that. I want that medication where I don't want to eat and all I eat is me. Yeah, I was like that's all I want.
Speaker 3:That's all that sounds good right now yeah, that's funny.
Speaker 2:Um, but any other side effects?
Speaker 3:I mean, it was mostly just like GI stuff, Um, but nothing really like anything else that I've like. That's been noticeable. Um, there's only negative ones, but there have been positive ones.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh good, okay, yeah, yeah, I'm. I'm curious what you would say to someone who is like like if you were talking to like Jake pre-medication and like you now were talking to him then and he was like I don't want to be on medication, like I don't think, like I can do that, it's too expensive, I don't want this. I don't want what would you like say to him, knowing what you know now, this.
Speaker 3:I don't. What would you like say to him, knowing what you know? Now I think I would say like I feel, like I would go specific, but I don't necessarily think that would benefit the listener.
Speaker 3:Um, so I'll go a little more general um you can be specific okay, um, so apply this to your areas, um, but I think, for like moments where I really felt anxiety of like in staff meetings or ideation meetings, it was like the way that you feel like everyone's just looking at you, the way that you think everyone just like analyzing you. Like that goes away. There's going to be some trials in the yeah, but it's gonna stop. Um, there will be, you will. You will see some shortcomings, um and like your different aspects of your life, but you will have the clarity and the focus to be able to improve upon them. Um, to have that retrospection is a retrospective thoughts.
Speaker 3:It's really helpful and so like just just try it, take a leap, find people around you that will help you and you'll be OK yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And what do you say to people that they're scared of side effects?
Speaker 2:or they're scared of. They're scared of side effects or they're scared of, I mean, and a lot, of, a lot of times, like the most common ones that people worry about you know, are like not eating, or some people worry about gaining weight, some people worry about sex drive decreasing, like that. I know that's a big one that people say they're so concerned about the symptoms that they they're so concerned about the symptoms that they are willing not to try because they are so worried about that.
Speaker 3:I mean, I think for the symptoms issue, you can figure out which medication is right. I was very lucky when it was like a first try. That works. It works good, no symptoms. That was very great. But even even if that those symptoms didn't subside, I think I would have still continued, just because, like I knew what it could do, I knew the the positive benefits of what was possible, and so I think, like you can keep the negative symptoms in mind but you can't let them rule your decision, and I know that's very easy to say now that I'm on this side of medication but just stay strong on that, like the right medication, the right I don't wanna say concoction but the right build of meds is out there one way or the other.
Speaker 3:Um, and so finding a good psychiatrist and all of that and that support system is huge.
Speaker 1:You can do it definitely having like a support system with it too but yeah, I think sometimes that's like the drawback for some people as they're like well, I don't know, like I can't do it, like by myself, and like I understand that, because I think like it's like if, if you're not in the place, like you were, where it's just like kind of like a, you try the first one and it it does work, and you're more on this end of it where you try, yeah, all of them.
Speaker 1:15 20, yeah, um then then you need someone to be like okay. Well, like is, what is your psychiatrist saying? Like, what are they doing to support you? Are you also doing this? Like how can I help? Like and finding the person is also hard, and I've told this to many of my friends, Like when they talk about, like thinking about getting medication. I'm like, if the finding of the psychiatrist is the part that's holding you back, like let me help you. Like I will like give me your insurance information and tell me, like your radius of where you want them to be and or if you want them online, and like we can look together, like find someone who will do that with you and who, like knows what to look for, Because I'm like I remember when I was first trying to find like a good psychiatrist and it's so overwhelming, Like there's just because you already feel depressed and anxious.
Speaker 2:And so everything feels like a lot of work, and that's actually one of the symptoms of depression. Yeah, it feels so I can't. I can't figure it out. I can't take the time to figure it out because I am so exhausted and everything feels so hard like you can't even really get out of bed, so how are you gonna?
Speaker 1:like open your computer and start researching, like doctors in your area. So like find somebody who like for, like I feel like I'm feel like I'm that friend, like for people. I'm like if you need me to do that, like I will find them and I will go as far as making an appointment and giving them your number to call for the rest of the information. But I'm like it's there, you can. You can always put hurdles, yeah, put hurdles, yeah, in front of you. But to me, and especially like where I was like at an extreme and you were getting to a point where you were like really unhappy, it's like the choice is like you can ask for somebody to assist you and then like not feel like this anymore or you're just gonna keep spending your life like like kind of miserable, yeah.
Speaker 1:And it doesn't have to be that way.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it doesn't so that's kind of where I'm like you like just ask someone to help you.
Speaker 1:Like that sounds hard and it's not like a just simple thing, but like message someone, call someone, talk to someone that, like you trust, is like your friend, your friend, your parent, your brother, your sister, whatever, and just ask them like can you help me find some people? And like ask them to call them and give the office your number and then they'll call you that makes it, it takes something off of you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like just taking it like those steps at a time and then letting somebody help you is like like you don't have to stay here.
Speaker 2:No, yeah, and that's the thing that I think all of us would agree on Like it feels so much better being on the other side. It is such a significant difference that it feels worth whatever you have to do to get to that because it just feels so much better.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I think that that's really important. Also, when you said that about the table and being like you know, eating and food and diet being an impact, you know, and then medication, but also like counseling, I mean you, you two, are going to couples counseling correct yeah so like having that part as well, like when I first started medication I, that wasn't the first thing I tried, like I actually tried counseling and um, and so I think some of those parts can be very helpful as well.
Speaker 2:But that doesn't you know, that doesn't fix everything Sometimes. Sometimes there's like an actual chemical issue, an imbalance or whatever in your brain and you need, you know, you need, for me, I it. When I first started taking it it was like a felt, like a stigma. At least now it feels less in the world. But I mean, this was you know my gosh. How long has it been? I mean, I guess around the amount of time that you, maybe a little less, but like at least 20 years or so. But but my initial goal was like I don't want to be on medication for the rest of my life and, and so we were like that's not the goal. The goal is to like get you stabilized and then we'll go take it from there. And um, I mean, it ended up through trial and error being that, no, you do have to take medication for the rest of your life. It's like having to take insulin for the rest of your life, um, because I have a low serotonin level.
Speaker 2:It's not anything that I can do anything about yeah, besides what I'm doing, yeah, so, um, I mean an exercise and things like that are important. Yes, I'm doing those things, so it you know, but that's okay, it's like, but it's like coming to terms with that as well, like I don't. To me now that sounds so like why was I ever worried about that?
Speaker 1:but I know that some people feel that way, so and also like sometimes that's not the case, like sometimes you don't need to know you don't on medication forever, and sometimes it is like.
Speaker 1:I kind of reset you and you're like okay, I can wean off, I'm done and yeah yeah, and it's also like I think there's different circumstances of like it being like more seasonal or like you know, just like see where it goes, because like at least you'll get to the point of being in the mindset to actually make that decision in a rational manner.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, that's a good point and that's one of the things that, like my psychiatrist had said. She was like the goal right now, with the information that I have it was our first meeting or session. She was like the goal is to keep is to have you on medication for six months to a year, let your brain catch up to the serotonin levels or whatever chemicals she had mentioned, um, to see if we can get it, get it up to that like resting rate and then we wean you off and if you need more time, if you need less time, great, no problem. But she was very clear and I definitely appreciated, like her clarity and all that. So I was like, oh, she's not just trying to prescribe me something and move on. It was like, oh, she actually cares about my longevity and what works best for one person might not work for the other, and so I really appreciated that with with those sessions.
Speaker 3:Yeah, for sure that's good, yeah, all right.
Speaker 1:Well, that was good. Yeah, that was very helpful.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Thank you.
Speaker 1:Jake All right, well, I think that was good. Yeah, that was very helpful.
Speaker 2:Yeah, thank you, jake. Thank you. Are we going to do some lightning round questions?
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, yes, okay, let's see. Do you want to help me pick?
Speaker 2:Well, I can't see.
Speaker 1:Okay. Oh Well, you have your glasses All right. Oh, I'm going to do this one. Okay, what is your favorite junk food?
Speaker 3:You're asking me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we're asking you. Who else are we asking? Oh, each other.
Speaker 3:Um, my favorite junk food is McDonald's. Okay, that's my guilty pleasure. Huh, I don't know why. I think it's the salt. I do know why it's the salt.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's funny. The salt.
Speaker 1:If you could ask God one question, what would it be?
Speaker 3:So I feel like we asked each other this when we first started dating.
Speaker 1:I don't remember what you said. Do you remember what I said? No, Okay, because I'm like I don't remember us asking that.
Speaker 3:So the question that I always thought that I would want to ask him and I feel like I almost started crying a little bit when you asked me the first time we were doing these- Was this when we were like at camp?
Speaker 1:I think, so I feel like we were like in a workroom cabin.
Speaker 3:So the question that I would ask him was like did I make you proud? And and like things of that nature.
Speaker 1:Oh, I do remember us talking about this. We also talked about this recently.
Speaker 2:He says yes, yeah. Yeah, um, absolutely, you make him proud Um invisibility or super strength, strength, I agree with that. Oh, interesting, I would. Yeah, wait, there's another one.
Speaker 3:Your first celebrity crush. So this is a way back movie Kangaroo Jack. I don't even know that it's an older movie, but I remember it was the female lead in that movie or whatever. I remember we had this big, big TV. It was like one of those box TVs and I would watch the movie and I would pause it.
Speaker 1:Oh my goodness, Just on it, and I was like oh yes in kangaroo jack.
Speaker 3:Kangaroo jack was it the person that played jesse? I have no idea. I don't even remember the premise of the movie. Was it her sure? I just remember like pausing the tv and just like being enamored that is so funny.
Speaker 2:Who was your first celebrity crush?
Speaker 1:mine. Yeah, um, it might have been zach efron. It honestly might have been zach efron yeah, that's funny, troy bolton yeah, yeah it was. It was probably zach efron, I thought like I thought he was like going to be my boyfriend.
Speaker 2:Rob Lowe, rob Lowe, for sure, all day. Rob Lowe, I mean not now Hugh Jackman. But, Rob Lowe is still very good looking, as he's gotten older. He's also yeah, he's very good looking. But, it was definitely Rob Lowe in St Elmo's Fire.
Speaker 1:Yeah, zac Efron's not my celebrity crush anymore, yeah, but I, yeah, zac Efron's not my celebrity crush anymore, yeah, but I, I like him. I think he's a good person, but I also am like he is like, so, like jacked, yeah, well, I thought he did that for a movie, yeah, and so he had to like be on like different. I think he was like took medications and stuff to like be like that took steroids yeah, and so like he just doesn't look like him no, is he not like?
Speaker 2:is that not I?
Speaker 1:don't know, I haven't seen him, I'm pretty sure his jaw came back into normal shape okay, because I, I I don't know where I heard this, but I heard so handsome I'm like, why would you like take?
Speaker 2:well, he probably didn't think about the effects of his face well.
Speaker 3:so I heard that he slipped and fell in his house and had to get jaw reconstruction surgery. Oh, so that's why it looks inflamed and puffed because they were doing surgery on that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that stinks. All right, I think that's good yeah.
Speaker 1:Thanks for coming on here and telling us all your dirty secrets.
Speaker 3:Those are clean secrets. Yeah, thanks for having me.
Speaker 1:So don't forget to mind your heart on mondays. Yeah, um, and you can subscribe if you're watching on youtube. Um, subscribe so that you get notifications whenever we post a new video. Um, if you're listening, then leave us a review. Um, give us five stars because you love this podcast so much. Um, and if you are interested in any like kind of free coaching where we could answer your questions and go over the scenario, then you can click the link um below for that. Um, that's it. We will see you next monday. Oh, and happy almost halloween oh yeah, happy, almost halloween.
Speaker 2:How we forget about Halloween. Yeah, we just jumped right in.
Speaker 1:We didn't yeah, yeah, I know.
Speaker 2:So happy Halloween Bye.
